Home › Forums › Costa Rica Living Forum › Common Traits of Unsuccessful Costa Rican Expats!
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June 28, 2013 at 12:00 am #170202daviddMember
Hi Guys
I wanted to get some feedback from people that have been living here for periods of time.
I have observed some very commonalities of U.S. people that make the move to costa rica only to move back after a year or so.
can we share some common experiences here?? here are a few I have observed:
1.) living here and expecting to replicate your U.S. suburban lifestyle cheaper than back home
2.) living here and expecting everyone to speak english
3.) living here and not speaking Spanish- ( heck I have Canadian neighbors that invested life savings in a house here and not speaking a word of Spanish- sadly they are selling their house)
4.) living here and expecting to find [b]KITKATS[/b] :cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry: at all stores LOL
there are a ton more
any more.. this looks like a fun exerciseDavid
June 28, 2013 at 3:36 pm #170203waggoner41MemberInability to deal with “Tico time” and the pace at which bureaucracy moves. 😯
June 28, 2013 at 3:52 pm #170204VictoriaLSTMemberFear of curvy roads with no guard rails.
Trying to cope with brief power outages.
Traffic “suggestions” not traffic laws.
Expecting Anglo-Saxon traditions and law in a Catholic country
June 28, 2013 at 3:53 pm #170205VictoriaLSTMemberAnd my husband says:
No golf courses
June 28, 2013 at 5:26 pm #170206daviddMember[quote=”VictoriaLST”]And my husband says:
No golf courses[/quote] :D:D
thats good I forgot about golf courses its been that long!!!!
June 28, 2013 at 5:28 pm #170207daviddMember[quote=”davidd”][quote=”VictoriaLST”]And my husband says:
No golf courses[/quote] :D:D
thats good I forgot about golf courses its been that long!!!!
[/quote]
here is another: expecting the roads here to be the same as in the U.S. driving here leaves no room for error.. one slip and you could be off a mountain or cliff or in one of the large sewage drains.
June 28, 2013 at 5:58 pm #170208ImxploringParticipantJust a few for now. The common one’s I’ve noticed.
1. Only associate with, and befriend other expats.
2. Only drink and eat at expat owned establishments.
3. Consider spanish a foreign language forgetting they’re in a foreign country.
4. Don’t attend or participate in local events or fundraisers.
5. Don’t take the time to sit and talk to Ticos that might be learning english or might want to learn something about the US.
6. Don’t take note or call folks in town by their names. Remembering the fellow at the gas station, hardware store, or bank goes a LONG way!
7. Don’t take an interest in the school, people, or town you’re living in.
June 28, 2013 at 8:35 pm #170209costaricafincaParticipant[i]Well, some of us know that there are golf courses,[/i] it’s just that they are not all over the country and those that are located in the tourist frequented areas, may be more expensive than some of us want to spend.
Many expats only pay their utilities and do their banking ‘on-line’ so they don’t have to interact[i]with people[/i] in Spanish.
Checking the distance on a map, and going where they want to, takes [u]much[/u] longer than it should. 😯
Multiple marriages seem to ’cause problems’ when one spouse wishes to return home to [u]their[/u] grandchildren and the other one doesn’t.
Missing their old social scene in which they have had an important position …:roll:
June 29, 2013 at 2:05 pm #170210daviddMemberHere is a big one
older guys coming to costa rica and looking for love in all the wrong places 🙂
[quote=”costaricafinca”][i]Well, some of us know that there are golf courses,[/i] it’s just that they are not all over the country and those that are located in the tourist frequented areas, may be more expensive than some of us want to spend.
Many expats only pay their utilities and do their banking ‘on-line’ so they don’t have to interact[i]with people[/i] in Spanish.
Checking the distance on a map, and going where they want to, takes [u]much[/u] longer than it should. 😯
Multiple marriages seem to ’cause problems’ when one spouse wishes to return home to [u]their[/u] grandchildren and the other one doesn’t.
Missing their old social scene in which they have had an important position …:roll:[/quote]
June 29, 2013 at 2:21 pm #170211ImxploringParticipantThat’s a big one! I love seeing those 60 something guys with the 30 something Ticas…. then the little Tico. The usual path involves a break up after the baby is born…. then she’s back with the boyfriend she never stopped seeing.
Silly gringo is now on the hook making payments and getting visits from the local police when he doesn’t make his payments promptly! And don’t even think about running back to the states. That will cost you too!
Funny, I might be wrong, but I think the payments are called a “pension”…. I guess it fits since it’s sort of a retirement plan for the Tica and her boyfriend…. all courtesy of that older gringo looking for love!
Best advice is if you’re coming to Costa Rica to go spelunking be sure to use protective equipment and have good strong illumination to see where you’re going and what you’re getting yourself into. Sometimes those tight passages are very easy to get into but extremely difficult to get out of after you’ve explored them.
June 29, 2013 at 6:09 pm #170212costaricafincaParticipantSome North American women I met over the years, also came hoping to find a partner, but found themselves, still lonely, but part of an ever growing group, while many men found ‘love’ [i]usually[/i] with a younger [i]Tica[/i].
I remember reading an article I think it wasvwritten by George Lundquist, that more single females ‘return home’ than couples.June 29, 2013 at 6:25 pm #170213elindermullerMember[quote=”costaricafinca”]
I remember reading an article I think it wasvwritten by George Lundquist, that more single females ‘return home’ than couples.[/quote]Not sure about that, I have been single for many years, raised my 2 kids without a father, and I do not have the wish to go back to my country for partner-hunting. Looking at most of the couples around me, I find that I am better off being independent and self-sufficient. I would never ever in my live want to hear these questions again: where have you been ? where are you going, why and with who ? when are you coming back ? what’s for dinner ? etc. etc.
I find that the “grandmother-syndrom” gets many couples to return to their country (“we have to go back because now that we have a grandchild our kids need us” ….. )
June 29, 2013 at 6:56 pm #170214daviddMemberelindermuller
I salute you because being a single woman here especially an older independent woman sure leaves little choices in the partner pool here as a majority of men in the same age group are out frolicking with the younger ladies. So It is indeed tougher to find any compatible mates.
I have had female friends that finally left costa rica because they could not deal with the TICO Macho attitudes that is ingrained in this culture.
but dont get me wrong as I can also understand that mindset being that men in the U.S. in general have been castrated over the years by the women in general that coming here and taking part of the fantasy
yes it is a fantasy of men ( except Sweikert of course ) to come and reclaim their lost manhood. 🙂
My wife is 20 years my junior and we have 3 wonderful kids together.
things are good
BUT they could be better if I can get that Reality show that had been discussed up and running.
[quote=”elindermuller”][quote=”costaricafinca”]
I remember reading an article I think it wasvwritten by George Lundquist, that more single females ‘return home’ than couples.[/quote]Not sure about that, I have been single for many years, raised my 2 kids without a father, and I do not have the wish to go back to my country for partner-hunting. Looking at most of the couples around me, I find that I am better off being independent and self-sufficient. I would never ever in my live want to hear these questions again: where have you been ? where are you going, why and with who ? when are you coming back ? what’s for dinner ? etc. etc.
I find that the “grandmother-syndrom” gets many couples to return to their country (“we have to go back because now that we have a grandchild our kids need us” ….. )
[/quote]
June 29, 2013 at 9:15 pm #170215elindermullerMemberWhy do some people think that it is absolutely necessary to live as a couple ? In nature couples are forming when the female are in heat, and after mating they split up again, in most of the cases. Then they raise their kids in the group, herd or swarm. Makes sense……
Why do guys feel castrated when women claim equality ? I as a woman do not like the idea to be castrated either, and therefore I prefer to be without a partner and I am not poking around in any partner pool, I have better things to do. I just do not see in any couple I know a total equality.
I do not like the stuff about “my better half” etc. Nobody is half of something or somebody. Those who talk about their partner as “my better half” depreciate themselves. It is mostly the women who do that, they shrink so the man can grow.
The macho-attitude is present all over the world. Years ago I went to Australia and I found them super-machos. In Germany I have known macho-guys and I guess in the U.S. you still have a few that have not been castrated.
I have been living in Costa Rica for almost 22 years and from the very beginning I have hired and worked with Tico Guys for construction. I have not had any problems with them and they always have been respectful. the ony problem I had was my german (Ex)husband and I divorced him.
I have a friend who has a carpenter business in Germany, his employees refuse to take orders from his wife, even if she passes a message from the husband. They stop working until the boss shows up on site. They are Bavarians, not Ticos. Maybe it is the guys in rural areas that have the macho-genetic, all over the world.
By the way, why does “manhood” mean to dominate women ? In the old days manhood also meant to fight wars on horseback and hunt bears. Who of you goes out with their sword and fights a war or hunts a bear ?
July 2, 2013 at 3:01 pm #170216spriteMemberMy Latin wife is 9 years my junior. I am of Anglo Saxon heritage and I live in Miami and over the decades, I have seen enough culturally mixed marriages to make a general statement; a marriage between an Anglo male and Latin female works out better than between two Anglos or between a Latin male and an Anglo female. There is a decidedly strong bias in Latin culture for males to dominate in obviously unfair ways( or try to dominate) the arrangement. In Anglo cultures, it is more of an even sided affair, but still somewhat male dominated.
I would not give good odds to any North American female for coming to CR for a mate. She is going to expect a modicum of equality is some important areas. The Latin male will simply consider this unacceptable. Someone has to abandon his or her cultural bias.
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